Tuesday, 16 June 2009


I thought you were my fairy tale, a dream when I’m not sleeping - a wish upon a star that’s coming true – Vanessa Hudgens

Do you ever find yourself questioning something that you never thought you’d query? Perhaps you were so immersed in the moment that you forgot to look at the situation rationally, and now you realise that maybe you aren’t in the flawless little bubble that you thought you were in?

That isn’t to say that you don’t love what you are experiencing. There are just less than perfect factors involved that are gradually engulfing and destroying all the reasons for your joy. It can seem impossible to accept these new revelations, but often the first step to being happy again is to try to understand the negatives, thus allowing you to brush them away and start afresh.

But what happens when the bad points outweigh the good ones, or when you begin to suspect that you are, in fact, the cause of them. That’s a lot for one individual to have on their conscience, and often you can’t even discuss it, because the person you should explain your feelings to is the one that these thoughts are being derived from.

It’s a difficult thing to do, to watch someone inflict suffering on themselves and to not leap in to stop them. It seems to be popular opinion that often the best course of action is the simply let them make mistakes, and then hopefully they will learn and thus will be able to better solve the problem in the future. But what if that mistake isn’t just failing a test, or falling off a chair. What if it’s something much more damaging? Because essentially, eventually you could let someone make the mistake that ruins their life. There comes a point where you have to take action, but what if that ruins everything that you have built? Are you prepared to give it up to potentially make them happier? On the off chance that it could make their sky a little less dark?

However, what happens if you are the crutches holding them up? You take that away and everything crumples, thus furthering the destruction. How can you tell if you are the reason for a problem, or the only thing stopping it worsening? But you can’t ask for fear of causing pain, or hurt, or insult. Do you continue on your current path? Or take a different one? And in addition to that, it's so hard, and so draining propping someone else up. It isn't being resentful, saying that. It's a fact. And if you're feeling unhappy, tired and drained, how are you supposed to support someone else? You're hardly going to be providing the help that they need.

I don’t know, life seems to be so full of ‘buts’ and ‘what ifs’. But every once in a while I guess we should all take a risk and just go with our gut instinct. Although what we are to do if we have no clue in the slightest, I am not sure…